Let me hear you call my name.
 Well, we meet again. I'm Alexa, but you already know that. However, you might call me Lexi, which is cool. Like me, cool that is. I make my own friendship bracelets like it's my job. But it's not. I work at a seasonal restaurant. I have an iPhone and we all know that makes me superior or something. Oh yeah, I'm like 21 or something like that. I love photography and have a Nikon D60... which I don't use. What more could you want from me? Just read. More than words.
You know you love me, too.
Layout is by Cia: (Blog | Acc)Icons/banners are from: Stopthetime / Reviviscent respectively. Links inspiration are from: Alissa. xoxo |
And I don't know.
Wednesday, August 5, 2009
 I don't know why I am the way I am. I don't know why I'm miserable. I don't know why I let what Kate says get to me. I don't know why my confidence is so low. I don't know why I can't speak to people. I don't know why I'm so shy. I don't know why I'm socially awkward. I don't know why Mike loves me. I don't know why people care what I say. I don't know why I knock myself. I don't know why I can't stop crying at work. I don't know why I get so overwhelmed. I don't know why I can't believe in myself. I don't know why I feel like I'm pretty much worthless. I don't know why I get crazy sometimes. I don't know why I let my hormones drive my life. I don't know why I feel so weak. I don't know why I can't waitress. I don't know why I can't stand up for myself. I don't know why I can't seem to be comfortable in my own skin. I don't know why I can really only talk to girls and not feel like a complete idiot. I don't know why I don't fit in with people my own age. I don't know why people older than me look down on me. I don't know why I can't seem to make any money. I don't know why I can't seem to not get angry when I think of Natalie. I don't know why I get so jealous of other girls. I don't know why I've been flipping out on Mike lately. I don't know why I'm so afraid of doctors. I don't know why I'm afraid of going to therapy. I don't know a lot of things, and I can't find the answers. It's been driving me insane lately, and I feel really, really alone. I don't know what to do. I don't know how to make any of it better. I rely too much on other people to make me feel better, but I don't know how to make myself better. I'm tired and I don't want to be like this anymore. I want to feel beautiful, be confident and know that I'm worth something. |
Goodbye.
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